June 20, 2006

I'm pro-life. You?

This is amazing. If it's true, score one for science.

June 17, 2006

Hard to Watch

I donated a few minutes of my time to an early nineties action flick this afternoon - Steven Seagal's Hard to Kill.

Holy crap.

I don't remember it being this awful when I saw it a decade and a half ago. My favorite moment? While Seagal is recovering from his wounds, he connects the dots and realizes the corrupt Senator Trent is responsible for his family's murder after hearing the senator's campaign slogan "You can take that to the bank!" on the television set. Seagal's reaction?

"I'm gonna take you to the bank, Senator Trent - to the blood bank!"

That's just awesomely bad, friends.

Good ol' Seagal. May he rest in peace.

June 14, 2006

Uber alles!

Gotta feel for those Poles. The hits just keep on coming...

June 04, 2006

Holy crap! Am I dying or something?

I received a bit of shocking news this past Saturday night. During the weigh-in ceremony for this summer's fantastic "Biggest Loser" competition, I was surprised when the scale revealed my official weight to be 219 lbs. As many people are prone to do, I made a New Year's resolution last New Year to get back in the Bally's habit - and, as many people are prone to do, I made it happen for all of a month. Point is, the scale at Bally's had me averaging about 10-15 pounds higher than what my official weigh-in on Saturday did. Similarly, the last time I stepped on my dad's scale back home, I was at an even 235.

Hmmm...

Knowing that I've done absolutely nothing that would explain my sudden change in weight these past few months (quite the opposite, actually), I decided I'd better get my own equipment just to be sure. So I picked up a shiny new scale this afternoon and took a look. Guess what? 218.5 pounds!

What's going on here? I know for a fact that my pants certainly aren't getting any looser, and until the competition officially began, I definitely hadn't been eating healthy! Either my few remaining muscles have been replaced with fat cells, both my dad's and Bally's scales were wrong, or I have some sort of disease that's eating me from the inside out.

Personally, I hope it's the second one.

I am so gonna win...